Au cours des dernières années, j’ai accumulé bon nombre de citations de toutes sortes. Je liste ici quelques-unes de mes préférées. Il est à noter que je n’ai pas gardé les auteurs de chacune d’entre elles, mais une simple recherche sur google devrait vous permettre d’en trouver l’origine sans trop de difficulté.

  • a facility for quotation covers the absence of original thought…
  • never explain–your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway
  • the most wasted of all days is one without laughter
  • it is impossible to defeat an ignorant man in argument
  • in an argument, stupid people tend to bring you down to their level, then they beat you with experience
  • men live in a fantasy world. I know this because I am one, and I actually receive my mail there
  • the more things change, the more they remain… insane
  • If you tell the truth you don’t have to remember anything
  • Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight
  • stupid is as stupid does
  • Nobody believes the official spokesman… but everybody trusts an unidentified source
  • her virtue was that she said what she thought, her vice that what she thought didn’t amount to much
  • the trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass
  • You can only be young once. But you can always be immature
  • Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them… well, I have others.
  • the advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time
  • here’s the thing about mistakes, sometimes, even when you know something is a mistake, you gotta make it anyway..
  • people everywhere confuse what they read in newspapers with news
  • Carol, There are just some things you can’t compromise on. Some things you can. New suit, yah. Dream house, maybe. But the girl… You can’t compromise on the girl. ~Ed Stevens (ep. 212 "end and means")
  • I’ll sleep when I’m dead.
  • Three o’clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.
  • first they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
  • the optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true
  • When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I’ve never tried before.
  • The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.
  • Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.
  • This is your life and it’s ending one minute at a time. –Tyler Durden
  • fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son
  • a moo point: it’s like a cow’s opinion. It just doesn’t matter. It’s moo. –Joey
  • Confusion is always the most honest response.
  • often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lampposts…for support rather than illumination
  • My purpose in life is to transport huge quantities of coffee from the coffee maker to a urinal
  • Do not seek death; death will find you. But seek the road which makes death a fulfillment.
  • ambition is the last refuge of failure
  • Crime does not pay … as well as politics
  • I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
  • if you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer?
  • I’ve given up reading books; I find it takes my mind off myself.
  • the devil’s greatest trick was convincing the world he didn’t exist
  • a beer in the hand is better than two in the fridge
  • nothing in this world that’s worth having comes easy
  • You know what it’s like, when you don’t want to miss them but you want them to miss you
  • Living is easy with eyes closed
  • I’ve never been drunk, but often I’ve been overserved.
  • better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt
  • Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.
  • It is strange to be known so universally and yet to be so lonely.
  • Solitude is painful when one is young, but delightful when one is more mature.
  • Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving
  • The pursuit of truth and beauty is a sphere of activity in which we are permitted to remain children all our lives.
  • Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age 18.
  • The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.
  • no day but today
  • He who dies with the most toys is, nonetheless, still dead
  • Here’s to you and here’s to me, and I hope we never disagree. But, if that should ever be, to HELL with you, here’s to ME!
  • I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
  • It is not exactly cheating, I prefer to consider it creative problem solving.
  • Alcohol doesn’t solve any problems, but then again, neither does milk.
  • Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.
  • The pessimist says, "this glass is half empty."
    The optimist says, "this glass is half full."
    the engineer says, "this glass is exactly twice as large as it needs to be."
  • "You know….we find your American beer a lot like making love in a canoe…."
    "Making love in a canoe…?"
    "Yes….it’s f*cking close to water…."
  • Marge, get me my address book, 4 beers, and my conversation hat.